Ask a Priest

5,442 Responses

Liv Rose (@oliviarose_art), on May 29, 2016 at 12:20 pm said:

Hi Father. Thank you for taking the time to answer my question about the calling to become a priest despite being a girl.
I have another seemingly random question, but if Christ were to appear to someone, what do they do following the event? Do you let someone know at the Vatican? What action should you take, obviously in addition to following whatever He instructed you to do?
Thanks,
Olivia Rose

FATHER JOE: If it is a personal communication than it should stay as such. Usually apparitions and private revelation that goes public does so because our Lord or the Blessed Mother commands or requests that the event or message be shared.
Ruth, on May 29, 2016 at 12:01 pm said:

Father! I’m sad, lost and feel cheated. I got myself a new job a month ago. My boss and his wife seemed to be nice people to work with at first.
However later on I noticed a change in the behaviour of his wife.
She used to ask me to do odd jobs and her personal work which wasn’t related un any way to the post for which I was appointed.
I could have easily run away without notice after receiving my salary. But i thought that’s the wrong thing to do since I promised my boss that I would never run away.
So i informed his wife yesterday that I would not be continuing after the end of this month.
She discussed this with her husband and after a couple of minutes asked me to vacate immediately.
I was okay with it and asked for my salary of 28 days.
To my shock she refused saying since I’m leaving immediately without notice she is not going to pay my money.
I’ve cried over this so much at home. I even cursed her so much.i feel so hurt. What do you think is right in this situation? Talking to her is hopeless as they are a stubborn bunch.

FATHER JOE: Other than legal redress, and that costs money, I am not sure what you can do.
Darren McBrien, on May 28, 2016 at 7:11 pm said:

I wear multiple Scapulars, the brown Scapular, holy love scapular, saint Michael Scapular, medal of the two hearts, holy face of jesus, holy face of jesus cross, miraculous medal, and pope john paul Medal.

I have decided to wear the brown scapular and keep the other scapulars for safe keeping. Altho the scapulars are all very important for me and the associated promises attached. Can you recommend regarding wearing multiple scapulars and also people have made comments to me about so many scapulars which has caused me to remove them and wear my brown scapular only.

What is the teaching regarding wearing multiple Scapulars??

FATHER JOE: I am not sure if there is a rule about how many scapulars one might wear. There are obviously practical challenges and the danger that a sacramental might be reduced to a superstitious talisman. Scapulars associate us with various religious communities and we must be enrolled before wearing a scapular. I favor the brown scapular of Mount Carmel. Scapulars allow lay people to have an association with various religious orders. Just as a man cannot be a Dominican, a Carmelite and a Jesuit all at the same time; I suspect that we cannot do justice to any one scapular with its community while adding other associations. My reasoning here is that you have to pick one.
Mary, on May 28, 2016 at 11:41 am said:

In the book of Mark Jesus condemns a fig tree for not bearing fruit even though it was not its season. I read that the fig tree is a metaphor in the Old Testament for the Jewish people. I don’t understand how Jesus could condemn a people this way. It does not fit my idea of a loving God. Would you please help me to understand this? Thank you.

FATHER JOE: A generation is condemned because while it looked alive and awake, it was actually without fruit and asleep to the signs and words of Jesus. It is not a collective condemnation of the Jewish nation for all time. Remember, this cursing of the fig tree comes as Christ prepares to enter Jerusalem. The Messiah had come and he was not recognized. Indeed, he would be rejected, betrayed, tortured and murdered. The cursing of the fig tree refers to the spiritual barrenness of Israel. They would bring judgment upon themselves. The text makes clear that it was not the season for figs, and so this part of the scenario is removed. Jesus uses it as a visual parable. Jesus is the revelation of the Father. He performs miracles, feeds the multitudes, heals bodies and forgives sins. His Cross will witness to the depth of his love. But the redemptive work must be embraced. Rejection of Christ is rejection of the saving name. None are saved apart from Christ… no one. God will not force his love upon us. We must accept it.
jeffakins, on May 25, 2016 at 4:27 am said:

Not a religious man
I have a disease that over the long term will be fatal.how bad of a sin is it to let the disease take its course and do nothing thnx

FATHER JOE: We are not morally required to do everything and anything to stay alive. The problem would be despair. The Church would always urge a message of hope, particularly when the ills that we know in this world can only be healed in the next. We are all mortal. But as a Christian I desire a share in the life and healing that comes from Christ.
Springflower, on May 23, 2016 at 7:08 pm said:

Dear Father Joe,

I need help with how to deal with my feelings with regard to a situation. My younger (and only) sister has always been emotionally needy and I have been the emotionally strong, well behaved one. She has had 2 children out of wedlock now, and one does not know his father. She is not married and has given birth to her second child with her boyfriend of a year.

I am married and my husband and I would love to have children, but have not conceived yet. He has a great, professional job and I am a homemaker. We live a very modest life and try to do what’s right in the eyes of the Lord.

This is why I’m really confused about what to do with the feelings I’ve had since she had her first child 4 years ago. I am struggling emotionally with all the attention and love showered on her and her two children from my family. She is also semi-supported financially when she and her boyfriend run out of money. My mother pays her student loan payments, even though she has a job. She and her boyfriend are on state assistance, and he does not work a regular job.

Our family seems to praise her choices and pay so much attention to her, visit her, and shower her with gifts because “she can’t afford” things. I see it a different way. They make poor choices with their money, have premarital sex, and take advantage of my family’s (and the state’s) generosity. My grandmother even bought her a car.

I can’t help but feel resentment toward her and the children, for being provided with so much, when the way they have decided to live isn’t right, in my opinion. I feel jealous and hurt that she gets so much attention, and I get none. No one comes to visit me, but my relatives will drive twice as far to visit her. I just don’t know how to work through my feelings about this, other than to feel hurt every time she does something that produces attention for her. How do I work through these feelings? I know everyone is the same in the eyes of the Lord, but how can her living a life full of sin be praised, while my life of trying to do the right thing is ignored?

Thank you.

FATHER JOE:

What can I tell you?

God has blessed you with a loving husband and a home. You are a responsible and hard-working couple. I will pray that God will bless you with children. While we cannot totally control our feelings, know that you have chosen the right path.

Like the elder brother in the story of the prodigal son, you have been faithful. But also like that story, a great deal of attention was given the prodigal when he came home. It did not seem fair. In truth, it was not fair as the world would usually view things. But maybe the compassion will open doors to healing?

Your sister has two children who will suffer because of her lack of responsibility. It may happen that her immaturity and wild behavior was enabled by the family. It is right to love and protect the children. It is right to let her know that she is still loved. But where I fault many today is over the lack of shame.

I would have none despair or be crushed by shame, but this sentiment can also incur an authentic sense of guilt for sin. Without this sense of wrong-doing, then there can be no remorse or sorrow. Without guilt, then how can there be repentance and an amendment of life?

You are angry and jealous. I can understand why. But you must also love your sister, praying for her and her children. You would not want to add to the sense of dependency that she exploits, but let her know that you care about her and that you would be there if she truly wants to change her life. Otherwise, she is facing absolute disaster. Parents and families age. People die. One day the safety net that she exploits may not be there.

I know a priest who gives money to a bum on the street. He is constantly criticized for throwing his money away on this vagabond and drunk. The priest tries to help him but he throws away all his second chances. Again and again, he comes back, destitute… pleading… crying for help. The priest has given him thousands of dollars of his own money, not the church’s. Why? Years ago, this priest remembers this bum as a young boy who served Mass for him. He was a smart youth, pious and full of promise. His parents were saints and the priest was regularly at their house for supper. The years went boy. The young priest became an old man. The boy became a middle-aged derelict. His parents sacrificed and prayed for him… but now they are dead. Except for this priest, he has no family or friends left in this world. There is no one else to tell him, “I love you.” The priest helps the bum because he still sees the boy and remembers the godly family. At prayer he can hear the ghosts of this man’s parents whisper to him, please Father, take care of our boy. Life can be complicated. It is rarely fair. But we do what we can.

I know the situation you face is hurtful. But think less about how your sister gets away with things and ponder more her need for prayer and change. Do not compare yourself to her; but rather, count your many blessings. Peace.
kmmoreno1, on May 22, 2016 at 8:05 pm said:

Father Joe,
Continuing with my previous question on the scapular. I have not been enrolled. I had read about the scapular and purchased one. I wore it for a few days before I go the chance to stop by the church. The priest only blessed it, not enroll. He stated because I was wearing it, he could not enroll it.

FATHER JOE: He is wrong, but I suspect a misunderstanding. Are you sure that he did not presume you were enrolled because you were wearing it? Generally speaking, you should not wear the scapular until enrollment.

As for my second question. I have been reading the Little Office of the Blessed Virgin daily. In your previous response, are you saying that I do not need to read it daily? Aren’t I supposed to say the rosary daily or fast on Wednesday and Saturday as long as I wear it?

FATHER JOE: Today all that is required is that you live a Catholic life, faithful to the Eucharist and the Sacrament of Penance. However, if you are reading the Little Office and/or engaging in special penances for the Sabbatine privilege and indulgences, please note that the privilege is no longer promulgated by the Carmelite Order. You can apply for the indulgence associated with Pope Francis’ Year of Mercy, and pray the Office for spiritual edification; however, like most promises from private revelation they have no weight under ecclesiastical law.
Mario, on May 22, 2016 at 1:59 pm said:

Father Joe,
I have a couple questions regarding the brown scapular that I am hoping you can answer.
1. I purchased a scapular and had been wearing it for a few days until I had a chance to take it to a priest. I stopped by a local parish and asked the priest to enroll it. He stated that because I had worn it, he could only bless it. Does that still give me the same promise? Or do I need to have the scapula enrolled. If so, how? Since I already tired.

FATHER JOE: The person is enrolled only once. Replacement scapulars are simply blessed by a priest. Was there confusion? Were you formally enrolled into the confraternity?

2. I have been reading the Little Office of the Blessed Virgin Mary. It has two chapters for each day, Prime and Vesper. I read the Prime each morning. Do I need to be reading Vesper at night? Also, I read that other options are to say five decades of the Rosary, or fast on Wednesday and Saturday. Are all these options that I can choose to do? Can I switch my commitments up on a weekly basis?

Thanks again for your assistance.

FATHER JOE: Unless you are a priest or deacon, there is no requirement to say the Office, either the Liturgy of the Hours or the Little Office of the Blessed Virgin Mary. However, it is efficacious as prayer.
Fred Murphy, on May 21, 2016 at 12:24 am said:

Father Joe. My intention is not to challenge the Catholic faith, with all due respect sir. My intention is, however, is to challenge biblical interpretation of a large portion of Christianity in regards to the true mercy of God.

FATHER JOE: It is more than interpretation that is being challenged, but the actual sources of revelation that are passed down through Scripture and Sacred Tradition. What you are suggesting is a wholly different belief system.

Many see Satan’s first lie when he said to Eve about eating from the tree of life “you shall certainly not die ”
Remember to fear the One who can destroy the body and soul.

FATHER JOE: The issue in mankind’s fall is not the devil’s deception but rather human disobedience to God.

A loving merciful God does not force eternal existence. This is contradiction.

FATHER JOE: We were made for eternal life. That which was lost is restored. It is not a matter of being forced, but rather a healing of a wounded nature.

You have not addressed my points. You have danced around them.

FATHER JOE: Your points were quickly dispatched because they lacked substance.

Choose one: love me or I’ll let you suffer forever, because I know everything and knew this would happen when I gave you free will. That’s not love, it’ blackmail.

FATHER JOE: If you love God then you would want to please him and live with him forever. The posture of the creature to the Creator is that of praise and obedience. Suffering is self-inflicted. God will not force us to love him. Heaven is literally to abide within the Trinity forever. Those who hate God would not want a share in that. If either angels or men reject God then hell is a space carved out for their eternal frustration and alienation. In a sense, you are making a weak apology for Satan. (Further, what God knows he knows as one simple idea outside of space and time. This knowing encompasses everything and is called the eternal Logos or Word.)
James Mancuso, on May 20, 2016 at 9:07 pm said:

Would you give an idea of the borders between physical affection and physical sin?

FATHER JOE: The borders are both physical and mental. We should nurture modesty and chastity. Anything that violates these elements is problematical. Acts that are preliminary to sexual conduct should be reserved to spouses. The Church has always been critical of heavy petting and French kissing.
Fred Murphy, on May 20, 2016 at 4:07 pm said:

This is not a question of spiritual struggling.

FATHER JOE: I take it you have come here to challenge Catholic faith, not to ask a question about it?

Why do 90% of Christians believe in an immortal soul? The contradictions:

FATHER JOE: Why do people believe in an immortal soul? Even apart from the Scriptures, I suspect there is a metaphysical reason. We do not want to die or cease to exist. We feel that there must be an object that this desire can attain. Some even claim that they have a sense of a world and an existence beyond this one. The body has parts and can break down and die. We ponder ourselves as spiritual-corporeal composites: that even if the body should die, the soul or ghost endures. Scripture speaks of Lazarus and the rich man. Our Lord tells his apostles that a ghost does not have flesh and blood as he does. His bodily resurrection points to our own restoration, body and soul. But in the life to come, after the final consummation and judgment, we will be different in that we will never suffer or die again. That is the faith. St. Paul speaks of the resurrection as the great hook of Christianity. It is the reason why so many believe, being labeled fools for Christ by an unbelieving world.

1. No one could be judged before the perfect life of Jesus to save us. I know, you’ll say purgatory.

FATHER JOE: This is a contradiction. If Jesus “saved” us, then were indeed judged and found wanting. He saves us from alienation from God– from the indictment of sin as the devil’s property. Suffering and death came into the world because of sin. The redemptive work of Christ makes possible salvation. He is faithful where the first Adam was not. The souls of the dead before the coming of Christ were in the limbo of the fathers. Jesus would descend to the dead and take the righteous with him. The limbo of the fathers no longer exists. Now we deal with the reality of heaven, of hell, and temporarily, with purgatory.

2. No one could be in Heaven yet, otherwise Jesus need not return.

FATHER JOE: The gates of heaven were closed by original sin. The oblation of the Cross is the means by which Jesus opens heaven to us. We are no longer breached from the Father. Jesus is the pontifex or bridge for those who would live with him in his kingdom. Jesus will return for the final consummation and the last judgment. There are indeed saints in heaven. Remember his words to the good thief on the cross—“This day you will be with me in paradise.”

3. The cause of sin, Satan and his angels are far more culpable and God could eventually destroy them.

FATHER JOE: Man misused his freedom and while the devil can negatively influence our world, we are still guilty for our sins. Note that Jesus engaged in a ministry for the forgiveness of sins. The devil and the fallen angels are spiritual beings and can be cast into hell but not destroyed. The annulation of either angels or souls would constitute a violation of the divine economy. What God has made, he has made.

4. The clincher: a loving merciful God forcing eternity, Heaven, Hell or Purgatory is in perfect contradiction. Never mind eternal torment. I rest my case.

FATHER JOE: You have not really made any case. You would violate both Scripture and the traditions of faith about soteriology. Heaven is an abode where the saints see and love God forever. They live within the Trinity. Purgation is a manner of being perfected or purged of those elements that distance us from God. Like a hospital, we go to be made well. As for Hell, it is indeed a tragedy. It is the failure to love. There is ample evidence of such a mindset and stony hearts in this world… with people who manipulate, hate and violate others. The gift of eternal life with the Lord comes with an openness to sanctifying grace. Similarly, tickets to hell are passed out through selfishness and continuing rebellion? (Without repentance, there can be no mercy.) We hear the rhetoric of the damned all around us. “You cannot tell me what to do! My choice over my body is more important than the lives of unborn children! Think the way I do or I will cut your throat! As long as profits are up, I don’t care about working conditions and low wages! Euthanize grandma and get it over, she is costing too much money to keep alive! What do I care about how pornography and prostitution victimizes women, what matters is my pocketbook and my happiness!” The notion of hell saddens me, but I am convinced that it is very real.
Candida, on May 20, 2016 at 10:09 am said:

Hello Father, I’ve 3 male children. Twins aged 13 and a 17 year old. I was divorced from their father for 7 years. However, in August of 2015 he fell very ill and has subsequently passed in March of this year. During his time in the hospital, he and I made peace and professed our love for eachother and before he took a turn for the worse, I was prepared to take him into my home and help him to get better. However, he never left the hospital and died there. That being said, while he was incapacitated, his brother or brothers took from him what he owned. I.e. Real property and bank accounts. Which of course my sons would have been the rightful heirs to. They know I’m aware of this and I have spoken with an attorney. However, I’m having a difficult time with it all as it has already and will continue to rip my boys from family they’ve known and loved. I’m not sure how to proceed. I know the love is there on their parts as well, but crimes have been committed with forged documents and theft. I’d appreciate some guidance. Thank you!

FATHER JOE: There is a matter of justice and your boys for which it is worth fighting.
julia, on May 18, 2016 at 11:03 pm said:

Hello Father, I’m doing a project for my religion class at school and I was wondering if you would be so kind as to answer a few questions:

What was your process of discernment like?

FATHER JOE: There was an initial sense of call but eight years of seminary was where I did most of my discernment. It was a matter of several things: a living relationship of faith with the Lord, growing in my knowledge of the faith, a regimen of prayer and service, and becoming comfortable with the priestly manner of life. Discernment for the Catholic priesthood comes hand-in-hand with an assurance that one can be happy with the daily sacrifice of living celibate love.

What is the most rewarding aspect of the priesthood?

FATHER JOE: The core of the priesthood is its identification with Christ and his ministry. That which is unique to priesthood is the most important: celebrating the Mass and the forgiveness of sins.

What is the most difficult aspect of the priesthood?

FATHER JOE: Many priests come from large families. But with the priest-shortage, many priests live in rectories alone. You are also not your own man. You always represent the Church.

Did you ever seriously consider any other vocation?

FATHER JOE: As a teenager I considered being a doctor, even signing up for pre-med.

How would you describe the priesthood to someone who knew nothing about it?

FATHER JOE: The priesthood is not a job but a vocation. You surrender everything, even your personal life, to the work of Christ. You belong, not to yourself, but to the Church. A priest by definition renders sacrifice. This is true both in terms of celibate love and the oblation of the Eucharist.

What advice would you give to people still discerning their vocations?

FATHER JOE: Do not hesitate. See a vocations director and go to seminary. A person might discern out but you cannot even begin to know without giving it a try. Do not worry about tomorrow. The vocation comes in steps… baptismal calling, vocation as a student, and maybe later to the priesthood, religious life or to marriage. Do not worry about tomorrow. Focus on the present and where God calls you now.

Thank you.
Kathleen Bowers, on May 18, 2016 at 3:17 pm said:

Fr. Joe,
Please explain the responsibility of a godparent of a family member who chose to be baptized as a Catholic in early adulthood fifteen years ago, and then chose to join and practice the New Age religion in recent years. Is the godparent accountable by Catholic doctrine to discuss with the adult godchild the lack of any connection to Christianity in practicing such a faith? Thank you for your guidance.

FATHER JOE: I am not sure what you are saying. If a Catholic defects from the faith or enters into the occult, I would prefer no subsequent sharing of faith (at all) with a godchild. The sponsor is probably in mortal sin and has nothing to give. Indeed, he or she may be a danger to genuine faith.
Kathleen Bowers, on May 18, 2016 at 1:53 pm said:

Fr. Joe,

Is the practice of yoga for health benefits contrary to Christian beliefs?
I have read conflicting viewpoints. Thank you for your guidance.

FATHER JOE: Exercises are exercises but if you subscribe the associated spiritual mumbo-jumbo, then there is a serious conflict with Christian faith.
Ana, on May 18, 2016 at 3:42 am said:

Hi Father, it’s been a little while since I’ve asked any questions or anything. I hope you’ve been well.

I’m in very desperate need of prayers. I still haven’t found a job to pay the bills, and I got a call from the bank today about my debt. I’m going to make some calls. I’m not sure what will come from it. I don’t know what to do. I thought this place I moved into was a gift from God, and thought He wouldn’t give me a place without giving me a way to afford it if I tried hard enough. I keep saying sorry to God for misunderstanding. I feel so stupid. Among the same other things in my life, I feel very lost about all this.

God bless you, Fr,
-Ana

FATHER JOE: Life can be hard. I am sick for the second time in four weeks. There are always troubles of some sort. I will keep you in prayer. Try not to lose heart.
sheryl, on May 17, 2016 at 1:53 pm said:

I had a 15 years of waiting for my fiance .we had a son and live together out of wed lock because he said he had u.s. petition and marrying me will dissolve the petition so i believed. He was always travelling as his work demands for it so its a normal set up that me and child stay at my parents house.when he resigned.from work he stayed in his hometown to put up business.for three years we settle in arrangement that he worked there and go home to us during special occassion and if we have budget for his airfare.i dont have any clue that he cheated,lied and betrayed me.as he always assure me that he has no capacity to find another woman.and its jus nonsense as life is so hard to think about having an affair with someone else.so i believed and trused him because i love him.it just last december that i found out that he married another girl.my questions are:
1.did God cursed me for having a child out of wedlock thats why i was not married to him?
2.will his marriage to that girl be blessed cause they follow the law to marry?
3.where is justice?i was betrayed but then he seems so happy.it seems that their marriage was made by heaven.where is justice for what he did to
us?it seems im the one suffering while i was the one betrayed.?it seems he get away from abandoning us .its like they are ok enjoying life while me and my son are the one suffering.
4.am i like hagar and the girl is like sarah thats why god sent us away?we were the first one and it turned out were the illegal one.is God unfair because iam not married to that guy?will God gave them special favor because they were married.?
Please enlightened me.may not my brokeness darkens my faith.i really need answer.it really bothers me

Hope to hear soon from you to enlighten me.

FATHER JOE:

I have heard the same scenario many times over and women are regularly fooled and used as you were. All the signs of betrayal were there but you did not want to see it. I am sorry but at least you have your son. I have no idea what was meant by the petition and suspect that it was part of his deception.

God did not curse you although having sexual relations outside of marriage is a serious sin. The pain and trouble was brought upon you by yourself. Your child was innocent of wrong. Given that the betrayal also hurts him, you should always let him know that he is loved.

Was your lover a Catholic? If he married in the Church then yes his union is presumably blessed by God. However, he will have a continuing responsibility toward his son. You were not his spouse and thus legally you have no entitlement to him or to his affections. That is why the Church insists that only married couples share sexual congress. You had relations with a man who never really belonged to you. Women can and are victimized by such arrangements.

Where is justice? Fornication and/or adultery do not imply an entitlement. Women often pay a terrible price when they give their hearts and bodies outside the institution of marriage. You opted to live and behave outside the protection of the law (of both men and God). What he did to you was wrong but you were both culpable. You played the part of mistress, not wife. Now you must move on and make a life without him.

Your faith may have been shaken, but until now you have not really lived your faith. Go to Confession and begin to live a life that is pleasing in God’s sight. Wasted time cannot be reclaimed, but you are not dead and you can still find happiness and purpose. God bless you. I will keep you in prayer.
Mary, on May 17, 2016 at 3:19 am said:

Dear Fr. Joe:

This will seem pretty lightweight compared to some questions but what do you do when your Church has embarked upon a Capital Campaign and it has consumed everything! It is in the Sanctuary, the Vestibule, the Parish Hall, everywhere. One coming in from the street would think we were all there for the Capital Campaign Mass, what with the finale after every Mass involving the Capital Campaign status report, the Capital Campaign guest speaker and the inevitable Capital Campaign donation plea. Help! Should we all leave? Is this normal?

FATHER JOE: Capital Campaigns are sometimes necessary but along with other collections can become somewhat overwhelming. There are also diocesan appeals, the regular offertory, second collections and imposed assessments where a percentage of every dollar goes to the diocese. It is what it is. Protestant churches sometimes insist upon 10% tithing of your income and make you sign financial contracts based upon your annual tax forms.
kmmoreno1, on May 17, 2016 at 2:01 am said:

Father Joseph,

I messaged you a few weeks ago regarding reading and writing in the horror genre, specifically possession. Your advice helped bring me solace in that I was not doing wrong by reading this type of material, however again I seek your advice.

Since the last post, I have begun reading Hostage to the Devil: The Possession and Exorcism of Five Contemporary Americans, by Malachi Martin. Martin was an Irish Jesuit Priest, and died in 1999. Back in the 60’s, Martin asked to be released from the Jesuit order, and became a citizen of the United States. From what I’ve read, he left on good terms, and his books are not Index Librorum Prohibitorum. In fact, I read that Pope John Paul II, Pope Benedict, and Pope Francis have all spoke positive of him. The book discusses how possession has taken people slowly over the course of many years. It tells how Satan disguises himself in normal day-to-day life and that simple pleasures could be part of his deception.

I’ve not finished the book yet, but I do find it playing with my mind. I pray, I got to church, and I recently bought a scapular to wear, but I still need to get it blessed and enrolled. That brings me to my questions. Does that bible not warn us against false idols? My understanding is that the Blessed Mother promises that those who wear it and live with a devotion to her will be saved upon death. Is showing a daily devotion to her not wrong? Is wearing the scapular not a way of idolizing it? Shouldn’t I only devote myself to Christ? I chose to wear the scapular because when I find myself bothered by the books, I have the scapular as a reminder of my faith and I say a Hail Mary.

Last, not knowing fully about scapulars when I bought it, I purchased one that has a metal chain, metal oblong medals encased in a leather holder. I just read that my first scapular shoud be cloth. Should I put this one away and buy a cloth? I don’t want to look foolish when I ask a priest to enroll the one I purchased.

Thanks again for your help. I know I asked a lot of questions, so any guidance you can provide would be greatly appreciated. I also finished the short story, not sure if you still wanted to read it. If so, please let me know where to email it. My personal email is kmmoreno1@gmail.com.

FATHER JOE:

Fr. Malachi Martin struggled with many of the changes in the Church. He was a close friend of a number of Popes, including Pope Paul VI. He privately offered the Traditional Latin Mass on a daily basis. I heard it said that his status was regularized prior to his death but I cannot say for sure. He was always regarded as in good standing with the Church. His writings were interesting and quite sensational. I always found it hard to discern his fiction from his facts. As for remarks about the devil, I would contend that there are few rules because the devil tends to break them. He might be subtle and whittle away at souls or he might be an exhibitionist so as to shock us. I would concur that his demonic presence in the world is in league with human iniquity, especially in reference to global persecution of Christians, the normalization of sexual immorality, and the numbness of consciences to the sanctity of human life.

You should be enrolled in the proper confraternity for the scapular and any priest can do so for you. The scapular makes one a member of a movement or society of believers, usually with special devotion to the Blessed Mother. The so-called green scapular is associated with Fatima and the brown with Our Lady of Mount Carmel. It is not a talisman or good luck charm. Such a mentality would indeed be superstitious. But like religious medals, it is a sacramental, a reminder of our faith and a tangible expression of our faith and prayer (personal and communal). Mary is always about bringing us to her Son.

Traditional scapulars are simple and made of cloth, but in truth, it really does not matter. It is worn under the clothes and no one will generally know it is worn except you. The importance is how it touches your faith and joins you to others under this patronage. It signifies a humble discipleship in the world. Consecrated religious sometimes wear large scapulars as part of their habit, the piece that hangs down in the front.

My contact information is in the ABOUT section of this Blog.
Paulie, on May 16, 2016 at 5:06 pm said:

Hello Fr. Joe,

I do have a question regarding intercession. Is it fine to pray the full Rosary (or a decade of one) on behalf of another? I mean like praying the Rosary for someone else as an intercession effort.

FATHER JOE: Any portion of prayer is still prayer. Rosaries are often said for others.
chinonye, on May 15, 2016 at 9:00 pm said:

Hello Father
I have a concern that has been bothering me for quite some time now and I just want to know where to take responsibility for any bad behaviour on my part and find peace. That being said, I ve noticed some happenings take place between my oldest sister, mum and immediate elder sister. My oldest sister is such a sweet soul, very caring, loving and thoughtful, always seeking to please family and friends. I ve noticed that my immediate elder sister always asks her to do stuff for her. She’s like “Olivia please could you help me do A or B” several times. But when my oldest sister asks my immediate sister for help, most times its met with a no or “I’m too tired geez can’t you do it yourself” or she asking me to go on her behalf. I ve noticed this time after time repeatedly and I can’t help but feel resentful at my immediate sister for treating my sister this way. She’s always asking people to do stuff for her but when she’s being asked to do something, she’s extremely unwilling to do it, too tired to try or sacrifice. Most times I don’t ask her for help cos I feel I would be met with a complain that she’s too tired etc especially when it came to bathing my handicapped sister. I feel scared asking her for help cos she would complain and feel that I’m being critical of her or hoarding ill feelings towards her. I’m not saying she doesn’t bathe her, but its so hard for her to do it, she might bathe her like once in 2 weeks if care isn’t taken or if you don’t nag her about it, she would totally forget and complain that she was reminded to do it. My mum has once said in anger that she always asks for things to be done for her, but finds it hard to reciprocate the gesture. I completely agree with my mum. I ve studied the four temperaments and understand that phlegmatics struggle with laziness, but then how do I deal with this? Am I being intolerant? Where do I draw the line? Where do I show empathy for her weakness? Sorry for the long post. I need your advice cos I ve been suppressing my emotions for some time now. Thanks.

FATHER JOE: How can I help? You seem to have a good assessment of the situation. Can your selfish sister change? I do not know. The family should discuss this.
Randall, on May 15, 2016 at 12:06 pm said:

I have recently joined to Catholic Church and been confirmed. During my first confession, I had nearly 49 years of sins to get out. It felt great when done. I was ansolved of all my sins! One of my past sins was adultery. The priest said it is best just to leave it in the past and so not confess it or bring it up to my spouse. He said this would just “open a can of worms”. I agree with him about this. However, is there any specific teaching by the church that would require a confession of a sin to a unknowing third party in order to totally receive absolution?

FATHER JOE: It is actually problematical to talk about sins confessed to a priest because if questions arise the priest is under the seal and cannot even acknowledge that the sacrament took place. There are cases where a person might have to make restitution (or try to do so). But again, nothing should be done that would target the priest for interrogation.
Nicole Z, on May 13, 2016 at 6:13 pm said:

Hello, this may be a bit of an odd question, but I am curious– I am considering getting a tattoo to sort of honor the saint I chose for my confirmation: St. Raphael the Archangel. I’ve looked up various symbols I could use for a more simplistic tattoo, and one of the designs I’ve stumbled upon is the symbol invoking St. Raphael from Peter de Abano’s Heptameron:

It is a very unique symbol, and this book has symbols for each of the archangels. Now, this book consists of ritual magical rites concerned with conjuring specific angels for the seven days of the week, combining aspects of Kabbalistic theology and astrological concepts. While I have interest in astrology, I’m not really a follower/believer in “magic rituals” and the like. I know that in general astrology is frowned upon in the Catholic church, and I want to make sure, before getting this tattoo, that I’m not putting anything disrespectful or “heretical” on my body when I am in fact trying to respectfully mark St. Raphael. Many thanks in advance for your insight!

Sincerely,

N.Z.

FATHER JOE: It is superstitious occult nonsense. Stay clear of it. In any case, saints are not honored by disfiguring the human body.
Dellenite, on May 12, 2016 at 6:59 pm said:

I don’t fully understand the layout of Gods design. Why would He allow evil, then also get mad when we are foolish enough to do bad things? If I leave loaded guns in a playground I can also consider the children who use them culpable? Is evil the problem or choice? If evil is bad why have it? If choice is bad why have it? Either one doesn’t point to why someone makes it or fails at life and the afterlife. What about people who have it easy at picking good all the time? Parents were available to guide, plenty enough not to steal or fight, beautiful spouse, nice kids, then also a sure path to heaven vs. someone who was poor and abused, neglected , angry, misguided and also hell on top of that? What’s the point?

FATHER JOE:

It is not possible for a finite human creature to comprehend the fullness of the divine providential plan.

While there are anthropomorphic elements to Scripture, God as a perfect Spirit is not subject to human emotions. References to God’s anger are really speaking about an objective and truthful judgment toward what we do to ourselves. Discussed before, the question of evil and pain is intimately connected to the matter of choice and human freedom.

Original sin brings forth a wounded or broken world. Christ seeks to heal it with his Cross, but the consequences of sin will not be undone until the consummation of the world. We are not promised perfect happiness in this world. Salvation is a gift that we do not deserve and cannot merit.
Molly, on May 12, 2016 at 2:13 am said:

Hi Father,

I am wondering about the Catholic Church’s stance of gender identity. I am friends with lots of transgender people who have experienced hatred and harassment throughout their lives, and many of them feel very uncomfortable in their own skin. I was wondering: is it a sin to dress in what you feel comfortable in, even if they are clothes meant for the opposite gender, and to be referred to by a pronoun different then the pronouns given to you at birth?

Also, I have been told that I have sinned by referring to my transgender friends using their preferred pronouns. Is that true? Is using their preferred pronoun a sin?

FATHER JOE:

Catholicism sees truth in the Scriptural teachings about human sexuality, particularly in the New Testament. The Church is also guided and restrained in its teachings by a rational and objective understanding of natural law. That is why we love our brothers and sisters who are regarded as homosexual and/or transgendered; but, their general status is judged as disordered. While various manners of dress are culturally conditioned or sometimes related to humor, the Church would tend to frown on gender confusion. This would also apply to personal pronouns.

I am not sure if the pronouns we use are necessarily sinful; we might merely want to avoid problematical arguments and further scandal. What you describe is a growing issue in the Church. I know several men and women who have had hormonal treatments and now wear the garb of the opposite sex. However, while an Alexa might now be called Alex and Frank goes by Frances, the moralists of the Church would still regard them the gender of their initial bodies and DNA.

Gender is not regarded as an accidental, like hair color, ethnicity or size. Gender is viewed as a constitutive element of our identity. It is what it is and is not open to human choice or manipulation.