Ask a Priest

5,442 Responses

Scarlette, on February 15, 2018 at 5:00 am said:

I will gladly take them.
Diana Strauss, on February 14, 2018 at 9:56 pm said:

Thanks for a prompt and clear answer.
Diana Strauss, on February 13, 2018 at 8:30 pm said:

What do you think about this problem?

http://thefederalist.com/2018/02/13/pope-franciss-capitulation-communist-china-betrays-people-faith/

Pope Francis’s Capitulation To Communist China Betrays His People And Faith Far from making life easier for Chinese Catholics, accepting Communist control of their bishops disheartens and oppresses them further.

FATHER JOE: I am not the Pope. However, I do not believe the Patriotic Church and the Communists in China can be trusted. It saddens me that we may inadvertently betray the good Catholics in the underground Church. The news recently reported that signs were mandated forbidding children to attend Mass.
Andrea White, on February 13, 2018 at 6:45 pm said:

I’m sorry to bother you, and we are not Catholic but I didn’t know where else to turn. My son (18 years old) woke up yesterday with the “Order of the Nine Angels” chant playing on repeat in Latin in his head. He doesn’t know a different language, he does good to speak proper English. We did a “Google translate” to figure out what it ment. We are deeply concerned and not sure why this has come to him in his sleep. What do you think?

FATHER JOE: I am not sure what to think. Has he been exposed to the occult. The Order of the Nine Angels is regarded as one of the most dangerous and Satanic of cults. I would recommend talking with a local priest and a regimen of prayer, especially for liberation and mercy. Peace.
Dennis, on February 13, 2018 at 4:42 pm said:

Would you recommend that a Catholic pursue a hospitality job at a hotel where they may be carrying luggage of homosexual or unmarried couples to their room; it seems this may be cooperating in something that is immoral.

FATHER JOE: I would think that helping with luggage is sufficiently remote as not to be an issue.
theinvisiblepeopleseries, on February 12, 2018 at 8:59 pm said:

Father, My mom recently passed and she had dozens, literally, of religious statues, crosses and pictures. More than I would ever use or want in my home. No one else in the family wants them. I can’t bring myself to pitch them, some are very nice, and Goodwill seems a little off too. What should I do with them? Thanks

FATHER JOE: Sorry about your mother’s passing. See if the parish can use them or send them to the missions.
Jean, on February 12, 2018 at 7:49 pm said:

Thank you.
angie, on February 12, 2018 at 6:02 pm said:

is it true that real priest are not allowed to act on such as television series?or tv guessting? if they are not really allowed,why?

FATHER JOE: That is not necessarily true.
Annie, on February 12, 2018 at 4:18 pm said:

My inlaws were Catholic, but the FIL had a fling and ran off after 33 years of marriage. My MIL married an Episcopalian and recently was ordained a priest in that church. We all went to the ordination service, but my children have always adored their grandmother, and now she is saying mass every week and my 16 yo daughter wants to go to the Episcopal church and even takes communion there. Now she’s calling the Catholic church “Roman” and talking about how its run by misogynists that want women to be nuns or brood mares. She’s talking like she wants to be ordained. My protests are met with eyerolling and she talks to me like I’m an antiquated idiot. She says she’s not abandoning her faith, she’s abandoning a corrupt religious hierarchy. HELP!

FATHER JOE: Someone is poisoning her mind about the faith. Catholicism is the Mother Church and we regard Anglican orders as null-and-void. Some of the greatest saints in the Church, including the Blessed Mother, are women. The priesthood is reserved to men but we are all called to holiness of life. While Anglicanism can transmit a love of Jesus and many noble traditions of faith to its people; it is a step backwards for Catholics. Your mother-in-law is neither a priest nor married in good standing. Regardless of why she was abandoned, without an annulment, she is still married to her first husband. That would make the second marriage an irregular union or what is traditionally called an adulterous state. How can she suppose that she can offer grace and the sacraments while, she herself, is probably in grievous sin? You and your daughter should pray for her but you are within your rights as a parent to insist that your daughter (a minor) attend Catholic Mass.
Jean, on February 12, 2018 at 11:17 am said:

I have talked to him for 17 years, to no avail. He does not listen.

He does not think there is a problem. He treats me like a best friend, not his wife.

FATHER JOE: I am so sorry. Are there any children? Do you have anyone nearby with whom to consult… your pastor, maybe? The problem seems deeper than sexuality. If he were truly your “best friend” then he would care. There is a problem because you say there is a problem. The issue is your relationship. I will keep the both of you in prayer.
David, on February 11, 2018 at 6:47 am said:

Dear Father Joe, I will curtail my posting for a while. Thanks for your answers to my previous questions. Your answers are very helpful to me and I hope to others. For my last post for now, I want to say how important sacred music has been in drawing me to the Church. Also the Latin language. I think this tradition is critically important. On this issue I side with the “traditionalists” who think we should maintain traditional music and also Latin. In any case, if you don’t mind posting a link, here is an example of what I mean. Best wishes and A.M.D.G. and please, if anyone is reading and is drawn to the Roman Catholic Church, follow your heart and just go to a Mass at least once and discover for yourself. Thank you.
Jean, on February 11, 2018 at 5:57 am said:

My husband has not touched me sexually for 17 years. I am not unattractive, but even when we were first married, and we have been married for almost 35 years, he showed very little sexual libido. He has some medical conditions that he has never shown any interest in seeking help about his impotence for 17 years. Is this a biblical marriage? I have never been unfaithful.

FATHER JOE: Given that the marriage was consummated, it is presumed to be a true and indissoluble marriage. Medical issues after marriage would not undermine its reality. It may be that you need someone to assist the two of you in dialogue about what you need and expect from your bond. The conversation begins with each other. Spouses should want to please each other.
Barb Malecek, on February 11, 2018 at 3:00 am said:

My husband and I are on vacation and staying with friends that are Catholic. However, they eat meat on Fridays during Lent. They know that we give up meat on Fridays during Lent. My question is do we not eat meat if they serve it, or do we eat it as not to waste food?

FATHER JOE: If they dismiss the Church’s laws about abstinence, then they are probably not practicing Catholics. True friends (even among Protestants) who know that you are seeking to follow the discipline would prepare the menu accordingly. If they do not, then you should excuse yourselves on Fridays. Would they give any scrutiny to the menu if Jewish friends who eat kosher food came over? I would hope so as it reflects the basic manners and etiquette of a host.
Albert, on February 9, 2018 at 9:11 pm said:

I appreciated your answer to he gentleman’s question about working at the funeral parlor. I am neurotic when it comes to scruples and constantly wear myself out. I know I have psychiatric issues with this to the point where a few years ago I was distraught over picking up someone’s ink pen at work and using it because perhaps I was stealing someone’s ink. I am aware now that such is silly and making too much out of too little. Please pray for my inner peace Father. Blessings to you and your congregation.
Al

FATHER JOE: Many prayers.
David, on February 9, 2018 at 12:17 am said:

Dear Father Joe, I am looking for a good book on the following subject. Perhaps you can recommend one (or more?).

I am interested in the early personalities of the Church, from the Apostles, to those who knew them, and so on, in a living chain of people who knew each other during the first centuries of the Church.

For example, I have read about St. Polycarp, who it is claimed was a disciple of St. John the Apostle, and whom St. John appointed Bishop of Smyrna. I am looking for an in-depth history along these lines.

Thank you as always.

FATHER JOE: Here are a few titles…

Faith of the Early Fathers by William A. Jurgens (Translator)

Church Fathers: From Clement of Rome to Augustine by Pope Benedict XVI (Author)

The Fathers of the Church by Mike Aquilina (Author)
Dennis, on February 8, 2018 at 4:05 pm said:

I have a history of scrupulosity, I think. I am looking for a part time job and came across one for local funeral home. I worry and was thinking some of the possible, athough seemingly unlikely scenarios for this seemingly honest and reputable funeral home. For example, what if they provide services for people who have turned away from God and there are evil spirits lurking. Am I helping to serve people of evil tendencies? Although I would not be participating in funeral services

FATHER JOE: You are making way too much of way too little.
samantha, on February 6, 2018 at 7:42 pm said:

Father I think he may be talking about the prodigal son as the Lord rejoices when one of his lost sheep are found which perhaps creates jealousy to the always faithful sorry for speaking out of line.
David Herwick, on February 6, 2018 at 9:54 am said:

I believe I read somewhere in the Bible that those who were bad and became good were held higher by God then those who were always good. If this sounds familiar to you could you share with me where to find it? Thank you.

FATHER JOE:

I am not sure what passages you mean. Here are three that speak of the need of sinners for forgiveness:

Mark 2:17 – Jesus heard this and said to them that, “Those who are well do not need a physician, but the sick do. I did not come to call the righteous but sinners.”

Luke 5:31-32 – Jesus said to them in reply, “Those who are healthy do not need a physician, but the sick do. I have not come to call the righteous to repentance but sinners.”

Matthew 9:12 – He heard this and said, “Those who are well do not need a physician, but the sick do.”
Renato, on February 4, 2018 at 1:05 am said:

Hi Padré
I am curious to know when man was created. Was it before the dinosaurs, millions of years ago or after? The Bible states that God made the land animals, including dinosaurs?, on Day Six (Genesis 1:24–25) How is that explained?

FATHER JOE: Catholicism does not insist upon a fundamentalist interpretation of creation. I suspect that the only dinosaurs that men ever encountered were those that evolved into birds. Authorities tell us that our ancestral line goes back six or seven million years; however, modern humans have only been around for the last 200,000 years or so. The last of the so-called dinosaurs probably went extinct around 65 million years ago.
dana, on February 3, 2018 at 10:46 pm said:

I am an aging single male with no oone to look out after me. As of late I am needing somone to accompany me to surgeries/doctor appointments. I don’t have anyone. The last time I posted for assistance on Craigslist. I know it is a sin to engage in suicide/doctor assisted suicide, but I am exploring my options. I know there are increasingly more and more people of my generation in the same position. I see this in my local neighborhood bar. I would rather be responsible dealing with my end of life care rather than having someone find me dead and sitting in my apartment for 3 weeks.

Any suggestions?

FATHER JOE: I would urge checking what resources are available from the local social services and the Church. You should be looking at ways to both live and to raise the quality of your life… not at looking at ways to escape it all. I will keep you in prayer.
Anon MS, on February 3, 2018 at 1:39 pm said:

I am currently a baptized Catholic but have not completed communion or confirmation. I am married now (a civil union) and have been married and divorced twice before. First marriage was in a Catholic church second in a courthouse. To complete RCIA and eventually get my most recent marriage blessed in a church, do I need to get two annulments?

FATHER JOE: You are not fully initiated but having been baptized you are under the marriage discipline that binds Catholics in regards to the sacrament of matrimony. The civil marriages conducted would not generally be recognized (although there is paperwork required) so as to receive a Declaration of Nullity Due to a Lack of Canonical Form. The marriage that was witnessed in the Church would require a formal annulment. When or if that annulment is granted, the current bond would have to be convalidated. Then you would go to confession and receive first Eucharist and confirmation.
bluesky17532, on February 3, 2018 at 12:07 pm said:

Hi, Father!

I am not sure how to interpret paragraph 1459 of the Catechism. Does “one must do what is possible in order to repair the harm” mean to say that we have to, in a way, undo every wrong thing we’ve done no matter how small or irrelevant it may seem? For example, if I had lied to someone about some mundane thing, like not having eaten a cookie I wasn’t supposed to eat, would I have to tell that person the truth? What if a long time has passed since a lie that does not seem to be of particular importance for that person at the moment? It seems to me that it would be unpractical (and annoying, for that matter) to go from one person to another confessing all the lies you’d told them or apologizing for all the harms you’d done them. What if I have stained someone’s wall a bit, do I have to paint it? I hope you see where I’m getting at.

Thank you so much in advance!

FATHER JOE:

Penance is a life-long activity. We seek to make amends for the wrongs and injustices of which we were a part. Using the example of a child who sins by stealing a cookie, he should do something to please his mother or to extend generosity to another, like giving food to the hungry. Yes, while sin can be forgiven, we are wounded by our sins. People become selfish or prideful or deceitful or whatever. Without efforts at justice, the constant bombardment of even venial sins might lead to mortal sin and the corruption of our character. The restitution will not always target the person or persons wronged. There are some matters that cannot be fixed. But we can still do “good” for the bad we have done. Indeed, our good acts should saturate our lives. No wrong is irrelevant.

Satisfaction

[CCC 1459] Many sins wrong our neighbor. One must do what is possible in order to repair the harm (e.g., return stolen goods, restore the reputation of someone slandered, pay compensation for injuries). Simple justice requires as much. But sin also injures and weakens the sinner himself, as well as his relationships with God and neighbor. Absolution takes away sin, but it does not remedy all the disorders sin has caused. Raised up from sin, the sinner must still recover his full spiritual health by doing something more to make amends for the sin: he must “make satisfaction for” or “expiate” his sins. This satisfaction is also called “penance.”

[1460] The penance the confessor imposes must take into account the penitent’s personal situation and must seek his spiritual good. It must correspond as far as possible with the gravity and nature of the sins committed. It can consist of prayer, an offering, works of mercy, service of neighbor, voluntary self-denial, sacrifices, and above all the patient acceptance of the cross we must bear. Such penances help configure us to Christ, who alone expiated our sins once for all. They allow us to become co-heirs with the risen Christ, “provided we suffer with him.”

The satisfaction that we make for our sins, however, is not so much ours as though it were not done through Jesus Christ. We who can do nothing ourselves, as if just by ourselves, can do all things with the cooperation of “him who strengthens” us. Thus man has nothing of which to boast, but all our boasting is in Christ . . . in whom we make satisfaction by bringing forth “fruits that befit repentance.” These fruits have their efficacy from him, by him they are offered to the Father, and through him they are accepted by the Father.
Anon, on February 3, 2018 at 12:55 am said:

Hello I have a follow up question about a previous one. I was snow tubing with my friends and we were the last ones on the slope and we weren’t supposed to go down the same slope but I did and went right down after my friend and I ended up banging heads with her and she got a concussion. Did I commit a mortal sin since bad consequences happened? I didn’t intend to hurt anyone. Thanks for your help!

FATHER JOE: I would hesitate to say it was a mortal sin. But you would be right to regard it as a reckless and stupid accident. Peace!
Anon, on February 2, 2018 at 10:38 pm said:

But what if the diary probably wasn’t supposed to be published? After all, most people don’t know when they’re going to die. If they knew, they may have destroyed their personal stuff in advance.

FATHER JOE: Does anyone directly intend to have diaries posthumously published? One might request that records be destroyed at death but enforcement of such commands is difficult. The best rule of thumb is DO NOT WRITE ANYTHING THAT YOU DO NOT WANT OTHERS TO SEE.
Anon, on February 2, 2018 at 2:11 am said:

Hi,
I’ve read that it is an invasion of privacy to read someone’s diary. What if they are famous and died over 150 years ago? Somehow I feel like I don’t have a right to read their personal stuff, just because it was personal when they were alive. This may sound like a ridiculous question but I would like to know. Thanks

FATHER JOE: The diary may have been left behind for others to read, as with that of Saint Faustina.